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Looky here! A watch that tells you the day, date and time in three time zones... plus... it tells you when your girlfriend is ovulating which means she will be at her peak of horniness! Talk about a "must-have!"

You rip out that page also.

Lordy! Here's a shaving mirror you can use in the shower! Gotta have that... so... you rip out that page too.

Holy shit! Look at this: It's the Ipen. It's little more than 5½ inches long and is the world's first combination ballpoint, view finder digital camera, a web cam…

All For Only $149.00!

Think I'm kidding? See page 19 of your free copy of the Summer SKYMALL magazine.

You rip that page out and, before you're finished 7 more pages containing stuff you just can't resist. The plane finally lands. It's a routine flight so you are only 5½ hours late. You fight your…

You check in. You're a non-smoker but, they mistakenly give you a room for smokers. You change rooms. But, the second room is not made up yet. You sit in the lobby for 2½ hours watch CNN vomit out the same news stories every 15 minutes.

Finally your room is ready. You carry your stuff upstairs and discover your plastic electronic key doesn't work. You trundle back down to the front desk and they apologize and re-mooglacize your key for you. You go back upstairs and this time, your key works.

You, being the anal-retentive guy you are, hang up all your clothes that are hangable, put the rest in drawers and neatly arrange your personal grooming stuff in the bathroom.

You call home. You tell your honey it was a routine trip. She tells you the water heater has broken, flooded the basement and the water is only 1½…

And, oh yeah. Your boss needs that inventory report by 8:00 a.m. Instead of noon…which means…you won't get any sleep tonite.

You talk to your boss the next day and he has scheduled 7 extra appointments for you.

All of which translates to this: Since you got off that plane, 110,000 things have captured your attention…and…those pages you tore out of the SKYMALL magazine are forgotten and eventually crumpled and tossed into the 'round file……because…

You Don't Have Enough Time

To Even Get For Yourself

The Stuff You Really Want!

Delay is the death of a sale. When a person has a …buying urge… the …shelf life… of that urge is about all of about 15 or 20 seconds at most. If they can order by phone and there is…

If not, the chances of you NOT getting the sales are almost 100%!

People don't like to give up their credit card info over the internet either. Even if they are assured their info is encrypted so thoroughly the NSA couldn't figure it out.

They will give out their cc info over telephone or on an order coupon. Why? Who knows.

Another thing: Computers are totally 100% unforgiving. You gotta type your ordering info at least three times and, if you hit ONE wrong key, you get an impersonal …ERROR… message and you have to do it all over. Scott Haines desperately…

Every A/B Split Test Has Proven That Only

Offering One Option For Ordering Has

Been More Profitable Than

Offering Multiple Options!

And, by far, the option that makes the most money is phone only. That's it…

Phone Only!

Ok, we've covered #1 (the product) and #2 (the sales pitch) so, it's time to move on to #3 (the …delivery system.…)

Let's be clear. When I talk about a …delivery system…, I'm talking about a delivery system for your sales pitch!

Examples of delivery systems for sales pitches are direct mail, newspapers, magazines, match book covers, face-to-face conversations, telephone conversations, radio, television, skywriting…and …of course…the weakest delivery system of all which is …

The Internet!

Why is the Internet the weakest delivery system for a sales pitch? Simply because, all you have to do to ignore an Internet sales pitch is to click …delete…. The Internet is the least effective delivery system but, it is also the most efficient.

Let me explain to you the differences between efficient and effective.

Efficient is paddling a canoe up or down a river with a perfect J-stroke. That means with the absolute least energy expenditure, you get the most forward movement of the canoe.

Effectiveness is paddling the canoe the right way (upstream or downstream) on the right river. Let's say you want to go to the river town of Marietta, Ohio. You've been paddling efficiently for three days upstream the Mississippi River. The only problem is…

Marietta, Ohio Is Located

On The Ohio River!

Doesn't matter how …efficient… you are. What you are doing is efficiently NOT going toward your goal.

However, let's say you start paddling your canoe upstream from Parkersberg, W.V.A. (where I was born in case anybody cares) and you clumsily (and very inefficiently) paddle your craft…

Guess where you will end up. Hey you got it right, soon (maybe in a few days if you are a really lousy canoe paddler) you will arrive at Marietta, Ohio which used to have the biggest oak tree in the U.S. I wonder if it still does? Probably not, chances are someone has chain-sawed it down and…

But dammit, no matter how inefficiently you did it…

You Got There!

And those other guys? The ones canoeing super efficiently up the Mississippi. They can be as efficient as humanly possible but, they will NEVER get to Marrieta, Ohio.