azdedislei specialreport

Look, here's a Swiss Army knife that is also a cell phone and a compass! Damn, you've been waiting for something like this for years. You rip out the page, stuff it in your briefcase and decide to buy it as soon as you get home or to your hotel.

Looky here! A watch that tells you the day, date and time in three time zones... plus... it tells you when your girlfriend is ovulating which means she will be at her peak of horniness! Talk about a "must-have!"

You rip out that page also.

Lordy! Here's a shaving mirror you can use in the shower! Gotta have that... so... you rip out that page too.

Holy shit! Look at this: It's the Ipen. It's little more than 5½ inches long and is the world's first combination ballpoint, view finder digital camera, a web cam and a stylus for your PDA. Discreet buttons (which translates to impossible to see) let you seek a specific function. The built-in 8MB memory can hold up to 400 images or connect directly to a USB interface to use as a PC web camera!

All For Only $149.00!

Think I'm kidding? See page 19 of your free copy of the Summer SKYMALL magazine.

You rip that page out and, before you're finished 7 more pages containing stuff you just can't resist. The plane finally lands. It's a routine flight so you are only 5½ hours late. You fight your way through the airport and go to the rent-a-car counter. After 32,718 questions, they give you the keys to a sardine can on wheels and you're on your way. 7½ hours later you find you find your rental car and drive around for 3 hours until you find your hotel which, of course, was only … mile from the airport.

You check in. You're a non-smoker but, they mistakenly give you a room for smokers. You change rooms. But, the second room is not made up yet. You sit in the lobby for 2½ hours watch CNN vomit out the same news stories every 15 minutes.