Search

The truth is, it doesn't matter how young
and thin I actually look to other people. The
calendar and scales don't lie.

Holy cow! I think I'm starting to slip into
a "senior moment" and let this tale get away from me. Even
so, before I
wrap it up, I want to tell you one more little…

I know a doctor who lives in Omaha,
Nebraska. He has made two financial fortunes in his
lifetime.

He made both of them because of me and my copywriting
ability.
Some time ago, in the not-too-distant-past, just before I
was beset by a horde of demons from hell, I announced I
wasn't going to be taking…

Look, if you can afford me and you need some sales
copy written...

I'm Available!

What you should do (once again, if you can afford
it) is hire me while the "getting's good". I have
a sneaking suspicion this door won't be open for very long.
For one thing, I think after Agora tests the letter you…

Secondly, every one of the few times in the past
I've announced I was willing to take on some clients, the response
was so overwhelming... the window of opportunity to hire a great
copywriter such as myself... didn't remain open very long.

I don't think it will this time either.

Hey, go read that letter I created for "Options
Hotline" again. Then sit and think: Do you really want
to put in the time, effort and energy to be able to write a
letter such as that? Maybe you're broke and you don't have a
choice. I understand that…

Sincerely,

Gary C. Halbert

Pathetic, Poor, And On My Knees Before The World

P.S. I just heard Tiger Woods is coming to Miami. I'm
going to gather up all the remaining money I have left and
bet him I can beat him at 18 holes of golf. Oh wait a
minute! That would be kinda stupid, wouldn't…

# 2005 - 09-01-05

From:

North of Jewfish Creek

Dear Friend & Subscriber,

It seems to me it would be almost sacrilegious
to write about anything in this issue other than the massive
misery and destruction caused by Hurricane Katrina.

I'll begin by describing my own personal experience
with this storm.

As far as I can remember, Hurricane Katrina wasn't
even mentioned on the news until Tuesday or Wednesday of last
week. At that time, it was described as "something we didn't
have to worry much about." The weather forecasters said
it might hit southeastern Florida but…

On Thursday, I was scheduled to fly out of Miami
to Baltimore to speak at the Agora Internet Marketing Seminar.
(Which, by the way, was an excellent seminar.) My plane was
scheduled to leave mid-afternoon. But I was afraid it wouldn't
take off before the winds got so strong from the "outskirts"
of Hurricane Katrina, all the flights…

I considered myself very fortunate as I was able
to board the plane. Once on it, I strapped myself in and we
rolled out onto the runway. And there we sat. And sat. And sat.
Our plane remained on the tarmac for two hours. Was it because
Hurricane Katrina's winds were holding us back? No. We sat on
that…

We Had A Malfunctioning

Toilet In The Back Of The Plane!

All the while, I kept thinking, "Come
on, let's get this baby in the air. If we don't leave fairly
soon, they're going to shut down the airport and I won't be
able to make the trip. We can do without a toilet for a…

Finally, the restroom problem was fixed by a maintenance
crew and we got off the ground and headed toward Baltimore.

The flight was nice. I met an interesting woman
from Columbia who was starting a business of importing mahogany
caskets. She and I laughed and joked and discussed marketing
while waiting on the tarmac and during the entire flight.

When I arrived in Baltimore, the people were courteous,
the city was clean and charming, the hotel was first class.
The people I met, especially those from Agora, could not have
been more accommodating and friendly.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch (meaning Miami),
the "nothing to worry about" hurricane did come ashore.
It came in about 25 miles north of where I live in Miami. And
then, the hurricane lived up to the name given it by the mayor
of New Orleans (he called it the "x-factor hurricane").
Hurricane Katrina made almost a 90 degree…

Then, in almost no time whatsoever, Katrina morphed
into the biggest Category 5 hurricane (meaning sustained winds
topped 155 miles per hour) in recorded history. I don't think
I need to describe to you what has happened since. It is the
biggest natural catastrophe in United States history and it
virtually dominates the news.

I'll talk about the problems being experienced
by the people in the hardest hit Gulf states (Louisiana, Mississippi
and Alabama) in a moment. But first, I'd like to tell you a
little bit about what this "nothing to worry about"
hurricane did to Miami.

As of yesterday, there were still 70,000 people
living here without electrical power. The estimated hurricane
damage to the Miami area is 100 million dollars. And
we are the people who got off "easy".

Just as a personal note, I didn't fly back from
Baltimore until Monday and Miami was, I would guess 85% back
to normal then.

Anyway, some of my well meaning, good hearted
friends in marketing are organizing various hurricane relief
efforts. I, myself, am not. At least, not yet.

Back when Hurricane Andrew demolished the southern
tip of Florida in August, 1992, the devastation was unbelievable.
Homestead and Florida City (hardest hit areas just south of
Miami) were completed ravaged by Andrew. Hurricane Andrew virtually
flattened that region. A couple of days after Andrew went through,
I hired a pilot in a single engine airplane to fly me over…

Those photos were used by the government to help
document the extent of the hurricane damage. They were also
shown on television while I was being interviewed describing
the damage. The most dramatic of the photos appeared in the
newspaper, "The Key West Citizen" and they eventually
hung for weeks in a Key West art gallery.