zflk blitzkrieg paradigm

Small companies, of course, have the greatest
potential for share price appreciation. Recently, Pfitzer, a massive
company, made front-page news all over the world because it
has just secured FDA approval to market a potency pill taken
orally just like an aspirin and, in just 30 minutes, it makes
it possible for pathetic guys like me to once again have a
"woody."

By the way, since I
haven't been able to depend on getting an erection for so many
decades now, you know what I started doing about 10 years ago?
I started carrying a small polaroid camera with me at all
times... and... if I get even a momentary erection, I take an
instant photo of it and write the date on the back of the
photo. That way, just in case it's the last one I ever get,
I'll have a record of it.

Plus, those photos save
me a lot of embarrassment. Let's say I'm on a date (blue moons
are more frequent) and things start getting hot and heavy.
But, my little soldier won't stand up and salute and the woman
I'm with starts to make fun of me and saying cruel things
like, "Hah! You're supposed to be such a stud and you
can't even get it up!"

It used to be dreadfully
embarrassing for me. But, not anymore. Nope, now all I have to
do is whip out my dated polaroid and show it to my date, smile
smugly and say, "Oh yeah? Well, guess what? I used
to be able to get it up and here's PROOF!"

Tell you what guys. That one sure takes the
starch out of those smug, cold-hearted
"only-after-one-thing" mean-spirited floozies! (By
the way, my doctor says there is still hope for me if any of
my readers cared enough about me to send a beautiful, hot,
sexy, caring woman down here to help me with this problem. I
told him it would never happen. I explained all I do is write
newsletters like this one which help my subscribers get rich
and none of them really care about me.)