Loosen your grip (life, business, and writing)

`1:26:53`

achieved and do some of the things that you've done. Like it's that's very aligned with the vision that I want for my life. And when I think of that, my fingers clench, I get tight. I'm like you need to do this. You know what I mean? And this this inversion that we're talking about here, it it requires a kind of just like surrender, a release, a relaxation that I think a lot of people and I know myself struggle with. Well, let me give you a little drum analogy because I'm When I first started, I gripped the sticks too hard. And when you grip the sticks really hard, you don't play as well for a lot of reasons. You can't get the same tone, um you don't have as much movements, there's no ghost note. It's like there's a lot of things that become harder and your hand cramps up so you can't play as

`1:27:40`

And by by relaxing your grip, you get I think that people have too tight a grip on business and think what they need to do is all these other things. And if you just lighten up a little bit and part of that is not paying So, I don't read industry news. I don't pay attention to the com I mean I know who the com competition is or whatever this, but I I don't pay attention. I don't want to pay attention because then you begin to inhabit other people's thoughts too much and you feel like I got to do it this way. And I I it's like if I've always like admired It's a weird like I've always like to visit islands where they just like evolved on their own in a sense. Yeah. Cuz it's just more interesting. Yeah. Everything's more interesting there. Because it it just didn't It wasn't influenced by other things and it

`1:28:26`

like had to find its own way and um I feel like if if you grew up that way, like we founded our business in Chicago outside of Silicon Valley. Had we been in Silicon Valley, we would have been a very different business and I think we would have been out of business. Right. Because we were all far away and weren't at the parties and weren't in the scene and didn't do all the VC stuff and we bootstrapped and did our own way and didn't pay much attention to that world, we benefited handsomely from it and greatly from it. Because we just had to find what worked for us. And if you pay too much attention, you end up doing what you think other people what you think you should do because other people are here's the seven ways to do this and the 10 ways to do this and everything's lists these days and all these success stories. Most of these people including like everybody Every Everything's held together by duct tape. Right. Every business is kind of a crazy

`1:29:13`

place. It nothing's very clear and clean and as it appears. People are making everything up as they go. Nobody knows really what they're doing and but there's this this air of like if you just follow this path it's going to be killer. You're going to be And like I'd pay less attention to that and just do your own thing. Yeah, it's funny as a as somebody who teaches writing I really wanted there to be like a method, a way of doing things that I could find by doing this podcast and then I could like a guru from on high sort of say I have gone and spoken to all the people Yeah. And I will tell you the exact method. And I've learned that there just is no method whatsoever. Everybody's

`1:29:59`

different. Everyone's got their own way. There's one thing that stands out. There's just one sentence from how I write all these episodes is you can do whatever you want but whatever it is that you do choose you got to be really really really good at what you do and the only way to do that is to have it be aligned with your nature and who you really are. That's it. You've got to find the nature of things. That's probably the thing that in life I've found to be the most useful tool in anything is like understanding the true or trying to understand the true nature of an experience, of a place, of a thing and rolling with the nature. Anytime you go against the true nature of something you're just battling unnecessarily. So yeah, figure it out. Find out the true nature of you or it or whatever it is