2006 - the 700 million dollar man

# 2006 - the 700 million dollar man

From:

North of Jewfish Creek

Dear
Friend and Subscriber,

I work out now with a trainer.

Six days a week. Everyday but Sunday. I do road
work on my treadmill and in the park near my apartment. I
pump iron, endure stretching exercises, let my trainer
torture me with a medicine ball and take more illegal
steroids than Barry Bonds. (That's not true Dimwit.)

A few days ago, after finishing my workout, I went
to a small diner and ate three steak sandwiches. After
that, I was overcome with the desire to hurt somebody. I
mean bloody their nose, blacken their eyes and kick them
in the balls.

You ever have that happen to you? You ever became
enraged for no reason whatsoever? I decided it would be a
good idea to pound on the young musclehead a few feet away
from me in the diner. Then, it hit me. I suddenly
realized that if I went after him, the bastard would
probably fight back!

I hate that part. When they fight back. I'd truly
kick a lot of ass if I could find a steady supply of
people who wouldn't fight back.

Oh well. My mood instantly evaporated. I gave the
musclehead a friendly greeting, tipped the waitress and
left the restaurant with no broken bones or bruises.